Safety in BDSM play - lessons learned

Lessons for BDSM, restraint, enhancement of submissiveness and dominance

Allergic reaction test

First, test the toys for an allergic reaction: apply to the skin for a few minutes at least an hour before use. Whips, reprimands, etc. that cause bloody wounds should be tested more thoroughly, as an allergic reaction may occur after the skin has been broken.

Free access of blood during restraint, sexual restraint

Avoid over-tightening when restraining, cuffing or binding any part of the body, including the penis or breasts. This will prevent blood access. The consequences can be fatal. In better cases, they can cause stunning, unexpected limitations in the ability to control muscles, and a nasty fall while unconscious or with limited ability to cushion the fall. Therefore, after release, be prepared to catch the immobilized person immediately. Do not bind or restrain for more than 60 minutes and always check for sensation in the restrained limb or other body part after 10 minutes. If not, release the aid immediately. The same applies to erection rings and vacuum toys (e.g. pumps). Insufficient blood supply can be felt by tingling in the first phase, then by paling of the skin. In this case, the affected person should immediately untie the tightened area and massage it. For bondage, a special - thicker cotton rope, whereby the rope is wrapped several times around the load-bearing point to distribute the pressure.

Stop signal during sexual restraint

Especially with toys that restrict communication (gag, mask), it is necessary to agree on the signal of the submissive participant that he does not want to continue. Whether the reason is excessive pain or discomfort, a feeling of threat, panic or a simple decision by the partner for no particular reason. If the submissive participant is unable to remove the aid on their own, never leave the immobilized person unattended. Otherwise, tragic consequences may result, including death, e.g. by suffocation. Pay particular attention to faintness, nausea or phenomena indicating choking or impending loss of consciousness. In this case, immediately release the person and check that they are conscious and well.

Erotic aids that restrict breathing - suffocating sexual aids

Some toys restrict breathing to enhance dominance or submissiveness (Gags, masks or collars), or indirectly e.g. partial chest retraction for certain binders or straps. These aids are not suitable for people with cardiac or respiratory (including e.g. colds) problems. The combination of breathing restriction and a form of restraint where the person concerned is unable to free himself or herself is considered to be very dangerous, with many deaths.

Increased oxygen consumption during orgasm or movement must be taken into account. Furthermore, tying or covering the head or mouth can induce agitation or even a panic state with increased oxygen consumption, where the mask or gag is tolerable in a resting state but not in an agitated state.

Ensuring independent release from bondage or restraint

When restraining, ensure that in the event of the dominant partner becoming incapacitated (e.g. fainting or more serious incapacitation), at least 1 of the following conditions is met a) the incapacitated person is able to release himself b) the incapacitated person can call for help (e.g. phone within fingertip range) or c) a 3rd person is present and able to help.

Always respect any honest hint from a partner not to proceed.

Erotic toys for bondage and restraint

For basic restraint, nylon harnesses are very often offered by other shops. These often cause cuts and abrasions. At similar or lower cost, they can easily be replaced by a good quality cotton rope or handcuffs a by chain with greater comfort and flexibility of restraint.